Let's Get Laos!
From Northern Thailand we crossed (legally this time) this daunting river border into Laos.
And proceeded to proclaim the passage possibly the most picture perfect political provincial posting of all time.
Traveling to Laos was like traveling 50 years back in time (Not that I've actually traveled back in time of course, at least not 50 years back, but I have it from reliable sources that that's what it was like).
While the locals in neighboring ASEAN nations climb over you to win your dollar, commercial exchanges in Laos follow a format closer to...
Adam : I can hear you back there. If you're not going to come out that's fine, I'll just go somewhere else.
Anonymous Server : ----- (That's what a blank stare looks like in text)
Adam : We'd like to order some food.
Anonymous Server : -----
Adam : I would like to give you this Kip I have here in exchange for food, would that be possible?
Anonymous Server : -----
Adam : Do you have a menu?
Anonymous Server : ----- (points to a pile of menus)
<5 minutes later>
Adam : I'll take the noodles and a Banana milkshake
Ingrid : I'll please have the fried rice and a Mango milkshake
Anonymous Server : ----- (Writes nothing down, Walks away)
<15 minutes later>
(Server brings out two plates of fried rice and two Banana milkshakes)
Adam : Ahhh, never mind. Looks Great.
<15 minutes later>
Adam : Check Please
<5 minutes later>
Adam : Check Please
<5 minutes later>
Adam : Check Please
<5 minutes later>
Adam : Check Please
(Adam and Ingrid leave money on table and depart)
Yup, so that's pretty much how they roll in Laos. It was actually a welcomed respite from the intensity of some of the other countries we have been to recently, but if the Laos people were any more laid back they'd be horizontal.
Hey, what time is it in Laos????
NAKED TIME!
That's right, the Laotians are totally cool with the birthday suit. Apparently they sell shirts in child sizes but no pants.
This kid looks so confident he could be Joe Pesci in GoodFellas "Am I funny to you? Do I make you laugh? Funny Funny or Funny HaHa? You're lucky I can't stand on my own, I'm gonna go be naked over there now."
On a few occasions I felt compelled to join the locals but was abruptly halted by my "let's not get caught up in the moment" wife. Rats.
Ultimately, Laos and us got on like Peas and Carrots? No that's not it...
Peanut Butter and Jelly? - Nope
White on Rice? - Nah
The Pope and the Popemobile? - Still not quite there
Cock and Football?
Yeah, that's it, Cock and Football!
First thing we did in Laos was head deep into the Bokeo nature reserve and participate in "the gibbon experience".
www.gibbonx.org
This is a burgeoning conservation project designed to turn tourist dollars into protection for the otherwise naked (like most Laotians) and heavily poached Bokeo nature reserve. The way that's accomplished is by allowing anyone with the funds to spend 3 days living amongst the gibbons in tree houses 45M (~150ft) above the jungle floor accessible only by zip lines! pretty cool, eh?
Like all other experiences in Laos, this had a special local flavor to it...
Adam: Did anyone here sign a release form?
Others : No.
Anonymous Guide : Okay, this is your safety strap, it goes on first. This is your roller and break, break goes in the back. Clip on the roller like this, check that your carabiniers are locked, and push off.
Other traveler : Are you coming with us?
Anonymous Guide : No.
Second Other Traveler : So we're free to zip as much as we like and there's no one in the woods with us?
Anonymous Guide : Yes.
Original inquisitive other traveler : Has anyone ever been hurt doing this?
Anonymous Guide : No, we've never had an accident here EVER.
Adam : You only opened 16 months ago and you were closed for 5 months during the rainy season.
Anonymous Guide : -----
It turned out to be fine though as Ingrid only managed to nearly kill herself once. We slept like babies as the tree house gently swayed back and forth each time a butterfly flapped its wings.
And the view was definitely worth the risk.
Sadly, the closest we got to the Gibbons was their photos on the internet, but we did befriend some monkeys along the way and an Asian Black Bear Cub.
The Cub was found in the possession of three poachers that had killed its mother the previous week. While the circumstances of the bear being there were rather unfortunate, the bear itself was a riot. It behaved so human it was scary! He would roll around on my lap, climb on my chest, then freeze when he noticed his own paw and gave it that look babies give their hands when it dawns on them that they may exhibit some sort of mind control over these unique creatures. Sadly, we didn't photograph the bear because it was dark and we didn't want to use flash (could hurt the little guys eyes ya know).
Our jungle hikes also turned up my very first LIVE millipede, Sans trackball and flying spiders,
And a tree that has adapted to mimic ubiquitous military camouflage! Amazing, what will Mother Nature think of next?
Leaving the Gibbons behind, we embarked on a two day, three bus, epic of an overland trip to Vang Vieng that included one nights stay at the fabulous Laos Bus Stop Intercontinental Resort. 5 stars and they've earned each one!
That was right up there with the 30 hour bus ride in China, but it was all worth it once we arrived in VV. Vang Vieng is the extreme sports epicenter of Laos. 24 hour pirated movies on big screen TV's, $0.50 fruit smoothies, and of course, Tubing.
Riddle me this, where else in the World does the local populous not only allow, but encourage legions of backpackers to get completely hammered whilst floating down a river?
If you Guessed "No need for a waiver Laos", you're right!
I'm at a loss to put the entire tubing experience into words. Sufficed to say it may be the single greatest sporting event of my life. Yes, that would be appropriate.
Don't be surprised if you visit us in the future to find me in on an inner tube in the bathtub demanding that you trade me $1 for a beer, then trying to negotiate a free hotdog.
I will concede however that consuming beer exclusively while sitting in direct sunlight for 8 hours does not make for a pleasant morning. But Laos is very hangover friendly, seeing as how they all move so slowly and all.
My Dad told me that when he visited the capital of Laos when he traveled this region back in 1732, it was nothing more than a few colonial buildings and dirt roads.
Well today it's a thriving metropolis with fancy government buildings
a Subway system
and Ingrid's favorite, Commies!
Guess some things never change.
And proceeded to proclaim the passage possibly the most picture perfect political provincial posting of all time.
Traveling to Laos was like traveling 50 years back in time (Not that I've actually traveled back in time of course, at least not 50 years back, but I have it from reliable sources that that's what it was like).
While the locals in neighboring ASEAN nations climb over you to win your dollar, commercial exchanges in Laos follow a format closer to...
Adam
Anonymous Server
Adam : We'd like to order some food.
Anonymous Server : -----
Adam : I would like to give you this Kip I have here in exchange for food, would that be possible?
Anonymous Server : -----
Adam : Do you have a menu?
Anonymous Server : ----- (points to a pile of menus)
<5 minutes later>
Adam : I'll take the noodles and a Banana milkshake
Ingrid : I'll please have the fried rice and a Mango milkshake
Anonymous Server : ----- (Writes nothing down, Walks away)
<15 minutes later>
(Server brings out two plates of fried rice and two Banana milkshakes)
Adam : Ahhh, never mind. Looks Great.
<15 minutes later>
Adam : Check Please
<5 minutes later>
Adam : Check Please
<5 minutes later>
Adam : Check Please
<5 minutes later>
Adam : Check Please
(Adam and Ingrid leave money on table and depart)
Yup, so that's pretty much how they roll in Laos. It was actually a welcomed respite from the intensity of some of the other countries we have been to recently, but if the Laos people were any more laid back they'd be horizontal.
Hey, what time is it in Laos????
NAKED TIME!
That's right, the Laotians are totally cool with the birthday suit. Apparently they sell shirts in child sizes but no pants.
This kid looks so confident he could be Joe Pesci in GoodFellas "Am I funny to you? Do I make you laugh? Funny Funny or Funny HaHa? You're lucky I can't stand on my own, I'm gonna go be naked over there now."
On a few occasions I felt compelled to join the locals but was abruptly halted by my "let's not get caught up in the moment" wife. Rats.
Ultimately, Laos and us got on like Peas and Carrots? No that's not it...
Peanut Butter and Jelly? - Nope
White on Rice? - Nah
The Pope and the Popemobile? - Still not quite there
Cock and Football?
Yeah, that's it, Cock and Football!
First thing we did in Laos was head deep into the Bokeo nature reserve and participate in "the gibbon experience".
www.gibbonx.org
This is a burgeoning conservation project designed to turn tourist dollars into protection for the otherwise naked (like most Laotians) and heavily poached Bokeo nature reserve. The way that's accomplished is by allowing anyone with the funds to spend 3 days living amongst the gibbons in tree houses 45M (~150ft) above the jungle floor accessible only by zip lines! pretty cool, eh?
Like all other experiences in Laos, this had a special local flavor to it...
Adam
Others : No.
Anonymous Guide : Okay, this is your safety strap, it goes on first. This is your roller and break, break goes in the back. Clip on the roller like this, check that your carabiniers are locked, and push off.
Other traveler : Are you coming with us?
Anonymous Guide : No.
Second Other Traveler : So we're free to zip as much as we like and there's no one in the woods with us?
Anonymous Guide : Yes.
Original inquisitive other traveler : Has anyone ever been hurt doing this?
Anonymous Guide : No, we've never had an accident here EVER.
Adam : You only opened 16 months ago and you were closed for 5 months during the rainy season.
Anonymous Guide : -----
It turned out to be fine though as Ingrid only managed to nearly kill herself once. We slept like babies as the tree house gently swayed back and forth each time a butterfly flapped its wings.
And the view was definitely worth the risk.
Sadly, the closest we got to the Gibbons was their photos on the internet, but we did befriend some monkeys along the way and an Asian Black Bear Cub.
The Cub was found in the possession of three poachers that had killed its mother the previous week. While the circumstances of the bear being there were rather unfortunate, the bear itself was a riot. It behaved so human it was scary! He would roll around on my lap, climb on my chest, then freeze when he noticed his own paw and gave it that look babies give their hands when it dawns on them that they may exhibit some sort of mind control over these unique creatures. Sadly, we didn't photograph the bear because it was dark and we didn't want to use flash (could hurt the little guys eyes ya know).
Our jungle hikes also turned up my very first LIVE millipede, Sans trackball and flying spiders,
And a tree that has adapted to mimic ubiquitous military camouflage! Amazing, what will Mother Nature think of next?
Leaving the Gibbons behind, we embarked on a two day, three bus, epic of an overland trip to Vang Vieng that included one nights stay at the fabulous Laos Bus Stop Intercontinental Resort. 5 stars and they've earned each one!
That was right up there with the 30 hour bus ride in China, but it was all worth it once we arrived in VV. Vang Vieng is the extreme sports epicenter of Laos. 24 hour pirated movies on big screen TV's, $0.50 fruit smoothies, and of course, Tubing.
Riddle me this, where else in the World does the local populous not only allow, but encourage legions of backpackers to get completely hammered whilst floating down a river?
If you Guessed "No need for a waiver Laos", you're right!
I'm at a loss to put the entire tubing experience into words. Sufficed to say it may be the single greatest sporting event of my life. Yes, that would be appropriate.
Don't be surprised if you visit us in the future to find me in on an inner tube in the bathtub demanding that you trade me $1 for a beer, then trying to negotiate a free hotdog.
I will concede however that consuming beer exclusively while sitting in direct sunlight for 8 hours does not make for a pleasant morning. But Laos is very hangover friendly, seeing as how they all move so slowly and all.
My Dad told me that when he visited the capital of Laos when he traveled this region back in 1732, it was nothing more than a few colonial buildings and dirt roads.
Well today it's a thriving metropolis with fancy government buildings
a Subway system
and Ingrid's favorite, Commies!
Guess some things never change.
posted by aiechter at 4:52 AM
2 Comments:
i love the zip lines. did that in thailand. funy feeling when you're standing on a swaying treetop looking out over the jungle realizing just how out of place you are. love the lao post! happy to see you both so happy!
Super!
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